Saturday, July 16, 2011

Harry Potter And A Touch Of Sarcasm...

Okay, so I have to wait 'til Monday to see the new Harry Potter movie because that's payday. Bummer. I'm so excited I could spit! Just kidding, if I do I will make sure it is not on your shoes.

So this past week, posts have had to be scheduled, probably next week as well. I hate doing that because I feel a little disconnected with everyone when I am not on here daily. Then I filter quickly through all the other blogs and rarely have time to comment, only on a few.

So where's the sarcasm come in? I've been reading posts about sarcasm, people working customer service and getting their sarcasm and snarkiness from their years dealing with ignorant (just a nice way to say stupid) people.

I have certainly had MY share of that particular piece of pie. Customer service was, if nothing else, entertaining at best. Irritating at worse. I have to say, my favorite people were the ones who would call me while I worked tech support. Now... mind you. I worked for an internet company and later on, tech support for a tax program.

Rule number one... don't piss off the person who is in control of resetting your password. Don't scream and yell at dozens of people because your kid got busted doing something he wasn't supposed to be doing per terms of service. Or your husband for that matter. I would have liked to have dealt with the husband in one case because the wife was an absolute train wreck of a witch. Before hanging up, (after changing her password and telling her what it was...) she told me, "F -- you very much." She almost had the phone on the cradle and her husband was in the background telling her "Wait, wait! What is... blah blah blah?" So I answered her question as politely as I could. And she said it AGAIN! Twice! "F-- you very much." *click* THAT time was doubly uncalled for. So I changed her password and put in the customer service notes: "Cannot be nice, swearing the entire time and just downright rude. If she calls back, yeah, I did reset her password because she was being a b--."

My all time favorites when I worked tech support for the tax software was the "Any key" situation. After installation, it would usually tell you to press 'any key to continue'.
"Well, where IS the 'Any Key'?"
"Just press ANY key on your keyboard."
"But I can't find it."
"It's the space bar. Press the space bar."
"Ooooh! Good to know!"

Then there was, I kid you not, the classic disc drive person who thought it was a cup holder. I ACTUALLY got that call, but no, I didn't start the joke.

I also got people who couldn't install it because the disc wasn't working. The amazement in their voices when I told them to wash it in warm water with a tiny drop of dish soap and then pat dry was priceless. They would always call back just to say, "It WORKED!"

And last but not least... there was always one poor guy I relentlessly picked on while working a convenience store. The one who would come in and ask if I could break his 50 dollar or 20 dollar bill. I couldn't get enough of the look on their faces when I said, "Sure!" and tore it in half.

Hope this gives you a good laugh on this wonderful Saturday! See you on Monday!


Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

You were vicious in retail!

Unknown said...

Oh no on the last one you were just nasty....but these are really good, sure has me smiling.

Mel Chesley said...

Haha! Well you know, I really didn't pick on anyone unless they picked on me first. ;) And I never did that last thing unless I knew the person had a good sense of humor and that I had tape. Lol!

Jamie Gibbs said...

That's amazing!! I'm in Customer service at the moment and it's....challening :P Get a lot of shouters that soon realise that they're being ridiculous and try to keep their anger as logic takes over and they get embarrased, hehe.

Mel Chesley said...

Haha! Yeah... challenging is a good way to describe it. I like it when the logic settles in and embarrassment takes over. lol!